Tuesday, 16 February 2010

Must I dream and always see your face?

When I was younger, my mum REALLY liked Jeff Buckley. She'd play his album all the time in the house. Occasionally I'll decide to listen to him and I'll usually listen to the whole album 'Grace' a few times and then not be able to anymore. My mum used to take me and my brothers to pubs and things and I remember one of them having a jukebox and sometimes I got to put money in it and pick a song. I remember my mum asking me to get it to play either 'Lilac Wine' or 'Grace'.
I knew the song 'Hallelujah' but I didn't know that it was such a sad song until one of the times when I decided to listen to the album when I was 14. It's one of my favourite songs. Jeff Buckley's version is my favourite.
Another version was playing in a bookshop the other day (not sure what one, as there are so many and I wasn't paying attention) and since then, I've been wanting to listen to the album like crazy.

I found a song on my external drive that my mum used to play in the car when I was younger that I can remember going on an epic search through the internet for last year. Never, ever knew what the song was about, but when I listened to it, I remembered nearly all the words...Anyway, I found it on my external drive earlier...I've been having a weird night of songs-my-mum-played-when-I-was-a-fair-bit-smaller...
When I listen to Jeff Buckley, I can smell a house we lived in when I was younger. It's not a nice smell. And it reminds me of watching 'Anastasia' on a videotape that someone got for us before it was released. And peanut butter on toast. And one night, my mum wanted to go to the beach with her friends and we ended up there all night, sleeping on the beach, even though I wanted to go home and kept asking mum when we were going to and we got McDonalds for breakfast on the way home.

Around the same time, my mum liked to play The Cure and my brother Erik loved the song 'The Lovecats' and I remember my mum and tiny Erik dancing to it, so when I hear that song, I think of that and I feel happy.

I can't remember the point of this blog anymore, now!
Today was pretty boring. Had to get out of the house. Went and saw 'Valentine's Day' as it was the one movie starting within an hour of my getting there that didn't have the words 'post-apocalyptic America' in the summary thing.
I'm tired of post-apocalyptic America.

In other news, my moleskine is beginning to fall apart. Usually I'd just say notebook, but this time I mean fucking-expensive-notebook-which-everyone-said-would-be-sturdy-and-not-fall-apart.
Kind of irked by this.

Saturday, 13 February 2010

I just love you, that is all, so I hope you come to my funeral.

I have downloaded two gorgeous but horrifyingly addictive things: Kayla Oberlin's EP and Zoe Boekbinder's album 'Artichoke Perfume'. I've been listening to the latter since I got home.

Today I went into town with plans to get a new pair of pyjamas and some ingredients for cookies. Instead, I came home with three new books ('The Fellowship of the Ring' -JRR Tolkien, obviously, and 'The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul' by Douglas Adams. And I felt like such a geek, carrying those two books to the checkout. And not even a good geek. A terrible geek...and I also got a copy of Fantastic Mr. Fox for about 79p), a copy of the newer Mighty Boosh live DVD (which is good but I don't think you should watch it in one go as it gets boring.)...we wandered around a bit and had some coffee and I had some of the surprisingly good bruschetta they sell at Costa (it's almost a guilty pleasure...but not really.) and got a roll of film developed (some really great pictures. And some blurry and discoloured ones, which I love equally. And for some reason, one day I thought a fruity drink was important enough to document...some of the pictures are random.)...and we got the most ridiculous photobooth picture taken to add to what is slowly becoming a collection that I keep in my wallet with my fancy pass that I got from helping at an Amanda Palmer concert last year, a tiny little picture of me that Johnny did on a little piece of cardboard the first time I came up here and...Hannah Montana stickers. Indeedy.

I've been reading break up blogs. Partly to counteract the sappiness I've been seeing as a side effect of people celebrating Valentines Day (lots of them claiming to hate it but clearly secretly loving the shit out of it...As long as they're with someone and get something). Most of them are by guys. Which is simultaneously surprising and completely and utterly unsurprising.
Always hearing about how guys 'don't care' but at the same time, I've watched more guy friends fall apart over their break ups than female friends. And I don't have that many guy friends.

Not much else to type.
Haven't been doing a lot. Was trying to put together something on the list of things I should do above my desk but haven't had much luck.
#4 on my list is 'Illustrate a song.', so I wrote out a plan of what I could do for 'Centre of the World' by Bright Eyes and stuck out a copy of the lyrics behind my desk...but I'm having no luck at all.


Saturday, 6 February 2010

They can't take- they can't take you from me.

Got a photo done in a photobooth. This is my current facebook profile image. I had it done in the train station and there were some men doing some maintainence work or something just outside it so I got scared that I couldn't go in and because I'm the most nervous and jumpy person you're likely to come across at times, that was bad. But Johnny went into it and said it was fine, so I did the 3 photos thing and found that the first two were shite and after adjusting the seat, I came up with this one. Not amazing but believe me, a vast improvement on the other two.
I've been drawing mice and watching QI all evening.
And doing 30 second drawings. Drawing quickly but still getting my point across is one of my strong points...however...poses I've never had reason to draw in a mere 30 seconds? Very difficult. Very. Still, I think I did okay.
Um...I drew a really great mouse?
I finally got an inexpensive coat that isn't completely ugly. I got 3 books as well. 2 of them are favourites of mine... 'Lolita' by Vladimir Nabokov -except who doesn't love that book? Everyone I've met has either loved it or been fucking creeped out by the whole thing.-, 'Before I Die' by Jenny Downham -I have never cried so much over a book in my entire life.- and I also got 'The God of Small Things' by Arundhati Roy, which I have never read. The charity shop from which I bought that and 'Before I Die' were doing a 2 for 1 thing on the books so I just grabbed the first book I saw that I hadn't read already but had heard of. Not sure how interested I really am in 'The God of Small Things'. I've heard good things but...I don't know. It just doesn't interest me terribly.
I've also been listening to Astronautalis. The only rapper I've ever liked. I saw him open for Tegan & Sara when Johnny and Lucy and I went to see them for my birthday (well, Johnny and I went to see them for my birthday but we also met up with Lucy because Lucy fucking rules). The title of my blog comes from one of his songs. I can't remember what song though because I've listened to it once. I just liked the line...

I've been messing around with inks and pastels and when I feel proud enough of something (I've done a few okay things but...still just messing around.) I might put it here.
If we're friends on facebook, you can probably go see stuff I've done recently anyway.

Note: If I sound like I am under the impression that someone is actually going to read this, it's just because I figure that if I'm going to put something out on the internet, I may as well not seem like I'm talking to myself. I understand that the void is just eating my words, as it has eaten many of my possessions in recent times.

About Me

'Audrey was born as a muffin in the early 20's. After nearly eight decades of staying the same age, she moved to London and was declared a fully grown human. She is an artist and also chocolate flavoured.' -Bekki Lisciandro • 'Like a lizard on prozac' -Sophia Moss • '[www.31paintingsinmarch.tk]..is a brilliant exploration of themes that reveals an intelligent stream of consciousness through a varied and engaging gallery of work. I was captivated, amused and driven to want to return to this site.'