Sunday, 20 December 2009

Made for blogging, I was not.

I'm sorry to the grand total of 2 people who regularly take an interest in this that it's not particularly epic. I'm not an amazing writer and my life isn't exactly action packed.

On Friday night, I went to see St. Trinians 2.
I liked it. It was weird.
Too much Sarah Harding though...

Came to London yesterday. Had to find my way to Rickmansworth and get a cab to some weird place to meet my mum who informed me that we (her, Will and I) would be staying at her friend's house. Something I'd have really liked knowing before I decided to head all the way there with 2 heavy bags. My phone died, as it likes to at random times.
I had 3 drinks and figured I'd pass out asleep. Did I? No.
I checked my phone for the time at 4am (3 hours after everyone else had fallen asleep. 3 hours since I'd started trying to get to sleep.) and then later at 5am. My head was all...weird...and...thoughtsy...and I felt ill....I got about 3 hours of sleep, in the end. Will and mum woke up at about 8 and so did I. They woke me, I mean.
I played Buzz with the kids (Will and my mum's friend's children) and tried to be brave and not revert to a 7 year old, begging her mummy to take her home. I drank a tonne of tea for the caffeine (for some reason the idea of drinking coffee in someone elses house always makes me sick. I can handle tea, though. I still can only drink coffee in my family's house or at a cafe. I don't even live with my family anymore!) and finally we left. After mum's friends husband got our car out of the icy driveway as my mum was too scared she'd slide. The drive home was torment. Sat nav=work of the devil.
We came home, I talked to Bekki, mum asked if I wanted to come shopping with her...I saw the Chinese resturant with the amazing all you can eat buffet for £4.50 a person which I haven't been to in...a long time, we went and had spring rolls and chicken and really awesome soup and all was good.
I picked out a pair of gorgeous knee high black lace up boots and a multi-coloured scarf (both of which I get on Christmas day) and am happy about this.
That is all.

Monday, 14 December 2009


I have it! And it's FUNNY. Best bits:
BigMAC: Armies moving against me, Queen's dead. Life is nothing but a lone poster tweeting his time upon the stage and then he tweets no more!
And the tweet versions of 'Alice's Adventures in Wonderland' and '1984'.
The next thing I want to get is (and this I know of thanks to Bekki) 'Ophelia Joined the Group Maidens Who Don't Float' which I guess is similar but Facebook.
I've spent my day listening to 'Festival' (my favourite song is Boxcar) and Lindsay from Festival's old band Cake Bake Betty (I forget the link for that. Google it.) and watching Friends and drawing. And thinking about painting but not actually painting. It's cold (yesterday I called my mum and greeted her with 'HELLO, from the ARCTIC!'
In response, she just laughed at me and asked if I was very cold.
I was.
We went into town and bought paintbrushes and a HUGE box of cornflakes and a tin of chocolates and other things that I forget...My legs went numb and my chin went numb...My chin...I don't understand.
Today my christmas presents for Will and Riley arrived. I got them dog tags with their names and things on them. I got Erik a shirt that I think will suit him, I got my mum an opal necklace, a book and a drawing of Will that I did that she loves and refused to let me get away without giving it to her. Oh and I got toffee and shortbread for Mark.

Bekki, Johnny and I are working on a webcomic thing, I think. I think I'm colouring it in and things. Because I like colouring things in and am 5 years old apparently.
Not that I have any problem with that! It's simple and I'm good at it.

The End.

Sunday, 13 December 2009

Tissue paper and stuff.

I bought 40 sheets of tissue paper for £2 and just want to buy more.
I have used some to wrap presents and highly doubt I will need a whole lot more and I haven't really thought up a use for what I have left but...oh the pretty colours.
I was thinking about trying again to do a 365 type thing like I did last year...This is probably the best from my attempt last year: (Day 10 in my Alice in Wonderland costume from Amanda Palmer's "Leeds United" video)
Though I don't understand why I didn't use this one, which is better (in my opinion):

-I am fully aware of the fact that no one other than me cares about these pictures. I just miss my lovely blonde hair.-
That was also juuuust before I lost a whole heap of weight really suddenly and oddly and felt sick and dizzy for a long time. That's passed, thankfully. It was a weird blotch on my existance though.

I don't know...It's nearly 1am and Johnny is on the couch watching 'Robot Chicken'...something I have never understood the appeal of...when I was in Melbourne, my best friend Josh used to make me stop whenever we were in the Virgin store under Myer so he could watch it on one of those screen things with the headphones and such that they have in shops...I miss Josh and his weird hair. Those were good days.
I'm actually going to Australia next year. I can relive those days! YES TO LIVING IN THE PAST. Which Johnny also seems to be doing because he just explained why he likes Robot Chicken and it was something to do with toys he played with as a small person.

I also bought these flower remedy things...I wasn't sure about them because they're really mostly brandy and water but...I feel calmer and more positive since I started using them like...2 days ago, I guess. So it's probably just me finally settling into my weird new life on the opposite end of the country to my family and feeling the relief of not traveling for hours and hours every couple of days...But I'm getting a bus to London on the 19th to see Will & co. for Christmas (I say Will & co. because really, Will is the 6 year old RULER of my whole family. And adorable. Which is probably why he has managed to be king of the castle for longer than me or my brothers before him).
And I have that weird herbal tea that is supposed to aid the sleeping thing...
Oh god. I've turned into one of those crazy people.

Friday, 11 December 2009

Foggy fog.

Yesterday it was insanely foggy. Even looking to the end of the weird little lane-pathway-thing the house is on was harder than usual. Everything was grey. So I stole Johnny's amazing camera (which I am considering running away with...Later I'll also marry it. That's how much I like it.) and took some pictures.

That one is one of my favourites.

Anyhow..I had 2 really odd dreams last night. I've been having so much trouble sleeping...I drank this tea last night that is meant to help with the sleeping and I felt as awake and as hyper as ever for a little over an hour...then I went to bed and drowsiness hit me like a truck. I had this dream where I had a car and I parked it in a big 3 level car park but didn't think about where I'd parked it...So I had to look everywhere and I couldn't find it. Eventually someone who worked at the carpark found it for me and I was grateful...For some reason I was at the shopping centre back home...I mean the one in Geelong which is near Ocean Grove where I lived in wasn't the same though...There were all these mexican resturants and things. My car was a red car and it was a 'Neo Ford'...Which is probably not even a real kind of car but I kept telling people it was that and it was written on the back...Anyway, then I was woken up by an alarm thing. Then I went back to sleep and had weird dream #2, which was basically the same was #1 except I had a motorbike and I stupidly left it on a sidewalk and then spent the rest of the dream trying to figure out who had stolen it/where it had gone. I remember lots of elevators but then that's about it.
This morning I talked to Bekki -FUN FACT: Bekki is my best friend and actually owns part of my brain.- and watched Veronica Mars, a show which I am really getting too emotionally invested in. So that was exciting stuff.
In an unexciting way.

I don't really know what to do right now! I don't really have anything to do! I just want to listen to Tegan and Sara and read. So I guess that is what I will do.
I think I'm going to go see Where The Wild Things Are later.
Or I'll put the lady from the Croc Odor ads into a box. and put it on a high shelf where no one will find her.

Audrey 'The Boring' Bishop.

About Me

'Audrey was born as a muffin in the early 20's. After nearly eight decades of staying the same age, she moved to London and was declared a fully grown human. She is an artist and also chocolate flavoured.' -Bekki Lisciandro • 'Like a lizard on prozac' -Sophia Moss • '[] a brilliant exploration of themes that reveals an intelligent stream of consciousness through a varied and engaging gallery of work. I was captivated, amused and driven to want to return to this site.'